Strange

It's taken quite a while, up until the last week or so, but I have finally stopped comparing life in our house to life on the road. I'm more used to the way the plumbing works in our RV than I am in our house. I'm sure by the time we get home it will take a few days before I stop looking for a dump station, or forget about filling up with water.
The differences are many and they are also great.
Obviously there is a huge difference in space. I can sit at the table in the RV and reach just about anything in the kitchen. That is convenient and confining at the same time. In Abby's bed you had better not jump up, because the ceiling is only two feet from the mattress. Showers are short or you run out of water, and the bathroom isn't exactly cavernous. You give up the space inside, because you gain so much outside.
When we hit one hundred days on the road, it meant that in total, we had spent 104 days living in the RV. Our pre-trip test run was a short one. Even though it answered a lot of questions for us about whether we could handle it, it was too short to answer everything.
Can I say that the tight space never gets to me? No. Can I say that it is completely worth the sacrifice in square footage? Yes.
The thing about this trip that will be the hardest to adjust to when we return home, will be waking up to the same scenery everyday. Granted many of the days we wake up there is nothing to see but pavement and parked cars, but I know that I'm just a few miles away from something I've never seen before.
I've become enamored with being a stranger. I enjoy not being a local. Sometimes the only difference between something exotic and something mundane is familiarity. Right now, in this moment of my life I'm enjoying the unfamiliar, the foreign and the strange. The World's Largest Ball of Twine comes to mind.
For the people of Darwin the ball is no longer the show, it's the parade of goofs like me that drag their families there to see it. They don't sit at Jack Tavern, across the street from the Twine Ball Inn, and talk about the ball. They talk about the guy in the Ohio State hat driving a campa pullin a campa that made his disinterested kids stand in front of the ball too long and take pictures. It's the foreign or strange that attracts your attention.

So now that I'm used to living in a smaller space and spending more time looking out a windshield than at a TV screen, it might be difficult to go back. Then again, maybe after 48 states my wanderlust will be satisfied. When the trip ends, I can bring back all the foreign things to my familiar space.

New View

In my boss's office at my last job, he had taped to the wall an old sheet of paper with the title "Attitude is Everything". It was a lengthy note and it's been quite a while since I've read it, but I remember that it suggested we control much about our day with our attitude. If we decide that we will have a positive attitude about our work and commit to that, we can maintain a positive outlook despite the problems that arise.

I can also remember thinking that following through on keeping a positive attitude is much more difficult when the number of problems increase. I was more likely to fall into a poor frame of mind and have it pervade all of my day.

I've often thought of that note since we left for our trip. Mostly because it has been much easier to maintain a positive outlook these days. What I have found is that while attitude is important, it is built on perspective.

My perspective on how things are going feeds my attitude. What has struck me the most about the first part of our journey is how many times I have stopped to really observe the situation. To look at what I am doing at that moment and put it into the scope of my life.

Sometimes it's easy, other times not so much. Quiet talks on the beach, easy. Hours in Washington D.C. traffic, more difficult. However, I have found that the more often I take the time to do it, the easier it gets.

You don't have to be on an epic journey to see it. It can be as simple as the new perspective you have watching "It's a Wonderful Life" for the first time as a father. I think that movie can give you a new vision every time you watch it.

My daughter will occasionally stop me in a moment and toss me into a different line of sight. The most dramatic, when I get a chance to look at myself from her vantage point. I learn something profound each time.

Sitting with her each day now and doing the job of teacher has made me want to send out letters of apology to all of my former teachers. She is a model student by comparison. It gives me a new perspective.

Waking up in a parking lot is much better in an RV. A new perspective.

Going to places I went when I was a kid with my children, and seeing them enjoy it or not. A new perspective.

I've told Becky a few times since we left that I look at somethings differently now. I'm glad I'm able to recognize it.

If I ever go back to my old office and see that note on the wall, I know that it will mean something different to me, because I have a completely new perspective.

What are you so worried about?

Worries can control your life if you let them. No matter what your situation, if you focus on your worries they can consume you.

Before we left on this trip we spent a lot of time trying to address as many worries as we could. Months and months of planning and re-planning to account for all the difficulties that we might encounter along the way. Of course you can't plan for everything. There are always unexpected expenses and situations that arise along the journey.

When I was working at my last job, I worried about how effectively I was doing my job. Was I getting enough done each day or putting in enough time at the office? I had simultaneous personal worries. Was I spending enough time with my kids? Why can't I get all my work done at home that I want to finish? These were the things that filled my head as I went through my everyday life.

I had hoped that when we left for the trip I could leave many of my worries behind. It would be difficult to work on a house that was thousands of miles away. My concerns at the office would obviously be left at my old desk. So I should have little to worry about, my mind should be at rest. Funny thing about my mind though, it just replaced my old worries with different ones. Now instead of worrying about what items I was out of at work, I spent my time thinking about the tires, and the oil and the transmission. I listened to every sound my new home made as we drove. Every squeak and knock and bump made my mental list until I was able to discern the cause.

I spent weeks obsessing about the transmission. Was it strong enough to handle the load of the RV and the trailer? How much would it cost to repair if it did fail? Over and over I rolled it around in my brain as I drove.

So when the RV did break down on a quiet road in the NY state park all my worries were validated. Right?

It took this major engine failure to convince me that I could worry all day long about a hundred things and it wouldn't change the outcome.

My new plan is to be as prepared as possible. Check the oil, the transmission fluid and have regular checks preformed and accept that that is all I can do. Even with regular maintenance there will be breakdowns. It applies to RVs, marriages, work and life. Besides, filling the time between with worry and angst is no way to travel.

Dirty Laundry

There's nothing quite like fresh sheets. I've always felt that way, even before life on the road limited our opportunities for doing laundry to every couple of weeks. Laundry day always feels so fresh, so productive. But the last time I visited laundromats on a regular basis was in college. And judging from the last 13 states we've visited not much has changed in 10 years.

I've found quite a variety of laundromat arrangements in my travels. There are the strip mall facilities, the stand alone buildings or the campground laundry rooms. I've even made a mini photo project of it. "Laundromats Across America" or something like that. Maybe I'll get around to posting those photos on the website one of these days.

The big thing I've noticed about laundromats is this: I go there to get some pretty personal items (i.e. underwear and sheets) clean. So why are the facilities usually so dirty. I apologize right now to the handful of laundromat owners in America I'm offending with this comment. But this is a widespread problem. I frequently find gunk left in the washers. If something drops to the floor from the dryer, it's probably going to need re-washed or at least brushed off vigorously. And forget about using the bathroom.

The one great thing about laundromats though is that despite the paradox of trying to extract "clean from dirty" I can get this chore done in about two hours. Which means, maybe I've saved enough time to catch a midday nap on those fresh sheets.

~Becky

Campa

In my old office I used to keep a notebook on my desk to record interesting or funny quotes. My friends Tim and Kelly we major contributors and when I left my office for the road, I gave them each a copy of my quote book.
My habit of writing down quotes stayed with me on our trip. My favorite so far came a few weeks ago when we stopped to fill up on propane. The gentleman topped off the tanks and while putting away his equipment said, "I been doin' this a lotta years, and I ain't neva seen a campa pullin' a campa."
It wasn't the first time we had been asked about our two campers, but it was the most expressive. It also made me think that I should explain our reasoning behind our "campas".
Reason one is simple, our driving vehicle had to have a bathroom. A four year-old's bladder only allows you to drive so far before a bathroom break. This ruled out pulling a travel trailer with our pick up, or using a 5th wheel.
Reason two, there are several hours between the time that the kids go to bed and the time Becky and I fall asleep. As all parents know, this is extremely valuable time. Most of that time is spent talking, planning, updating the website, writing, relaxing and listening to music. We wanted to be able to do all of those things each night without disturbing the kids.
To resolve these two issues, we looked at a lot of RVs and then we looked at more. We finally found the trailer we wanted on a lot in Findlay, Ohio. On the day we went to check it out I noticed the Cruiser tucked away in a far corner of the lot. We test drove it, were assured that she had the power to pull the trailer and made one salesman very happy.
Since our purchase and in the first couple months of the trip, we have found even more advantages to our travel train. Having two refrigerators, two bathrooms, extra storage, and the ability to chop 17 feet off our overall length are all things that have been useful at one time or another. Pulling the trailer also gave us an area to entertain my brother when he met us near New York City. If it weren't for the trailer, we would have been sleeping in the RV at the transmission shop, rather than spending the week at a beautiful state park. Now that Abby has started on-line school it's really beneficial to be able to take a four year-old distraction to another room.
It may not look conventional, but our "campa pullin' a campa" has served us well on the first leg of the journey.

Watch Your Kids

On our visit to Ocean City, NJ a week or so ago, I sat on my chair looking out at the Atlantic and day dreaming. My dreams were interrupted by life guard whistles and my attention was drawn to the back of the lifeguard chair and a sign that read "Watch Your Children". My first reaction was "Hey I just paid ten bucks to be down here on the beach with life guards, maybe you could keep an eye on them.", it was a gut reaction made without thought and fueled by laziness. I knew where Abby and Carter were, they were digging in the sand a few feet away, and with the help of some other children had formed a hole large enough to bury a Honda.
Still, I took the advice of the sign and instead of staring at the water I stared at Carter. I tried to really focus on what he was doing, to figure out what he might be thinking. He was working really hard at digging, in a matter of a few minutes the kids had met and established distinct working roles in the construction of this hole. He was clearing sand from the front and placing it in a pile behind him, where another child would pack it down. He took his "job" very seriously, he made sure to place the sand exactly where the other child needed it. I imagined that he must have felt that his job was very important, because he was very intent on doing it right. I enjoyed his facial expressions and even his occasional frustration when the wall caved in. We talked about it later and he told me about the plan that the group had for the hole and how they were building it.
I spent some time watching Abby as well. She was a water gatherer. Her "job" was to take a bucket down to the ocean and bring back water to fill in the mote. It was clear that Abby's mind works differently than Carter, just based on their movements. Abby works hard too, but when she goes from the job site to the sea it's a dance. I can tell there is a song playing in her mind and I'm not sure if she notices anyone else is around her. She has a wonderful capacity for losing touch with the real world. It's a skill that can be very frustrating if you are trying to get her to focus on homework, but one that will probably allow her to imagine and create things that other people can't envision.
So in the end I was glad that I took the time to really watch my kids. I think I will do it more often in the future.

Picture Perfect?

Here's another item for the list of things Our Trip has made me grateful for: Photography. Some days it doesn't even seem fair how many great pictures I get to take of my family and of this great country. Sunsets, smiles, mountains, beaches, historical buildings, animals. And I still can't capture it all.

We'll be driving down the road and there's this great mountain view and I'll go for the camera. Dan knows by now that I won't be satisfied with the photo because it's not 3-D or it's not panoramic. I just can't get it all in the same picture. It's just another example of "You just had to be there." It's okay though, because I still try for that perfect picture. And I think I'm lucky to get a lot of good ones.

I've always loved being behind the camera. I took classes in college and tested my skills in a couple newspapers. I even take plenty of pictures of the kids. But as with any hobby, I've just never been very good at keeping up with it. Sometimes I'll go months without picking up the camera. Or I'll take a day trip and forget the camera altogether. I even bragged a few times about my ability to pack so light that I could travel by plane without having to check any bags. But then I'd always leave my bulky camera behind. It was ridiculous because now I really wish I had more photos of San Francisco with Dan and Las Vegas with my girlfriends.

The other problem I have with pictures is keeping them all organized. Especially once everything went digital. Now instead of rolls of film in need of development, I have stacks of disks dating back to 2004, all needing to be printed or organized in some manner.

Having our own website has really helped these problems. It has actually forced me to document Our Trip in photos and organize them regularly. It's pretty easy for me and it's great for family and friends who like to keep up with our travels. Just days after we do something, they get to see it.

The very best part is that Abby and Carter will have all these photos when they're older. They may not remember everything we do. Hopefully, our photos will bring some of it back for them.